Overwhelmed...I think

Man. Who know that as soon as week 4 of the semester that I'd have all this work? I've already had big writing assignments due! One was an essay for U.S. Lit, due this week, which I wrote on The Great Gatsby. The other was for my Writing Process class, but then I have writing due pretty much every week for that class. Not to mention my Flash class, which has been difficult because I had trouble even getting Flash to install - I ultimately had to ask Adobe for a refund of the money I spent buying that program (I'm using a trial version now). I should've known better than to try to take classes for my web design certificate in my last semester at CSUSM, but since I was unable to take any classes for it last semester (because I ran out of money after Comic-Con), I'm trying to catch up. I wasn't able to get into the Photoshop class I put myself on the waitlist for, so I'll have to take that probably next fall (I am definitely not going to take a class like that in the shorter summer semester). But given the work I have so far this semester, I'm almost glad I'm only in one web design class. Two would've probably been WAY too much.

I worry though...I feel like school is becoming the only thing I work on lately, while my websites, my novel, and any attempts to further my relationship with God (like Bible memorization) are falling by the wayside. Now, I am going to Chi Alpha (a Christian group on campus) and I'm going to try to do this Bible study for graduating seniors that Chi Alpha came up with called Springboard. And I've started going to church with my parents, if only to spare them the hassle of having to take me to North Coast Carlsbad and possibly being late for their service. But is it enough? I don't know.

And I have been working on my novel in bits and pieces. If I have the energy to write and the willingness to put off reading The Sound and the Fury (the novel we're currently studying in US Lit), I might work on it today. I'm almost done with it, and I think once I get over the "falling action" (the part I'm writing right now) and into the dénouement, it will go more smoothly. Then I can finally leave it alone for a while. I'm going to hide the notebooks somewhere so that I can distance myself from the work before I revise, as all those writing books advise. Though how I'm going to make myself forget where I hid them is tough. But I suppose if I put them somewhere I'm not likely to look, like on top of that big blue box on my closet shelf - or even better, inside it - maybe I'll be able to do it. As the French say, Loin des yeux, loin du coeur ("Far from the eyes, far from the heart," essentially the French version of our saying "Out of sight, out of mind"). I'll have to hide the folder on my computer that has the typed manuscript too, come to think of it.

Some weird process just started on the Macs in this lab (I'm in the Academic Hall computer lab at school, writing this before my Writing Process class; Dr. Wilson doesn't allow laptops, so I didn't bring mine). Oh wait it's stopped now.

I wish I didn't have to go to work after school today. Last week I was able to deal with because Jose said he "needed me" that day - but this week they gave me the same exact schedule as last week, which is weird. Especially since they put me back on the Courtesy Clerk schedule after one week of finally being back on the GMC schedule, and they have a bunch of new Courtesy Clerks now, so they shouldn't need me to do that stuff. Plus, they have me starting at 2, and my class gets out at 12:45. I barely got there in time last time because I missed the 1:30 303 because the train was delayed at some point. I might be able to leave a bit earlier because we're having a writing workshop in class today, so we might be able to leave once our workshopping is done. Not sure though. Anyway, I stayed up late last night finishing my second draft of my first Writing Project, but had to get up early this morning because my class starts at 10. So I'm really tired. It doesn't help that it's also my time of the month. So I'm not really in the mood to work.

To be honest, I'm not looking forward to the workshop. I don't do well in writing workshops because I'm not good at giving feedback, other than really surface stuff like "I really liked this metaphor" or grammar and mechanics stuff. Maybe Dr. Wilson will give us some guide to go off of, like Dr. Breuer did last semester. Or even better, one that people can fill out themselves, like the one Dr. Berghof had us use for our research paper in LTWR 333 last semester.

Gah I feel so restless. I'm thinking about stupid things like the cover art being off for some of the songs on my iPod, which then leads to thoughts of my frustration over not being able to upgrade iTunes, which I don't want to think about right now. That or why my cursor randomly jumps on my laptop, resulting in me typing in the wrong places constantly. This just started happening recently and I don't know why. I keep glancing at this girl across the way who is looking at some Tumblr blog with a lot of Japanese-related pictures. Or at the huge pictures of Earth on the screens of the nearby Macs. Is that the default wallpaper for all Apple products? My iPod's default wallpaper was the Earth too.

As for the websites, my main concern right now is how to make my revival of my Sailor Mercury shrine stand out. I guess the info on Mercury as a planet, a god, and an element is unique, as well as the video game clips. I did look at a few other Mercury shrines last night, and there are some good ones still out there. Mostly old ones from a time when simpler web design was still ok. The only really current one is Innocent-ami.com, run by the fansubber Innocentami. That one is also the only Mercury shrine with any info on Ami in the musicals and PGSM. I guess I just need to find a layout I like. I was going with a pre-made one for a while, but the way it's designed is really limiting. I think the basic premise, of being the ultimate site for info and media of Sailor Mercury, is something that can work. I shouldn't have much problems getting images for the gallery, since the aforesaid shrines all have plenty of them, and I found a bunch of old scans I did for the original site on an old CD-ROM backup of a folder I had on another computer. I should be able to find scans for the musicals and PGSM at Seramyushop.com and Three Lights respectively, if they'll let me use them, as well as some stuff for her PGSM actress Hama Chisaki/Rika Izumi on the official fansite for her, A Fruitful Spring. As for the info, I still need to write most of it. I think I'll get rid of the International dub info page, since I can't find much info for most of the dubs, and most of the info is from a site that hasn't been updated in quite a while. I'll need to borrow Warriors of Legend again too (or buy it, maybe along with that French Kiki's Delivery Service poster on Amazon that I want, which just got marked down to 90% off) for the section about her special places.

It's getting late. I better go to class.