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Saturday, May 31, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #140: Citizen of Heaven

Today's Video: "Citizenship"

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Discuss/Describe three aspects of your world, your friends, music, TV, language or diet that are actually contrary to the kingdom of God. In other words, they drag you away from God. As a citizen of heaven, Phil 3:20, you need to create an environment that reminds you and nurtures a heavenly attitude in your heart.

Well I try to stay away from bad stuff for the most part. I was basically raised in a Christian bubble, with church and going to a Christian school. But I know I am influenced by the world, and have been pulled away from God. Last year I didn't tithe or read my Bible or do any sort of devotions at all. 

But let's see...three things. My addiction to the internet I guess is one. Not that I look at porn or anything like that. But I spend too much time online, time I could probably spend doing something spiritual. I also have moved away from writing strictly Christian fiction. I haven't written anything anti-Christian, but I have written stuff that wasn't overtly Christian. It may have Christian values in it, but it doesn't mention God or the Bible. (Then again, my favorite book of the Bible, Esther, doesn't mention God's name at all). Also, where before I would never have included alcohol or sex or anything like that in my books, I am becoming slightly more ok with that. Well, not the sex. That's not going to happen. But the alcohol thing I'm becoming more ok with (in the Doctor Who story I'm working on, The Doctor and the male protagonist Darren both drink, although the main character Alys does not). Cursing I am also against, though I might be ok with like "bloody hell" or something like that. I wrote a novel a while back where one of the characters was a rape victim, though the rape was not described in any detail. I also am uncomfortable still writing about drugs.

The main "objectionable" subject I've written about more lately is magic. I am a big fan of fantasy, Christian and secular. For NaNoWriMo 2 years ago I wrote a novel that was my take on the magical girl genre, complete with magic. And while I'm not a Wiccan or anything, I am ok with writing about magic, whereas some Christian fantasy writers aren't. 

I also don't eat very healthy at all. That probably doesn't make God very happy.

In other words, not living a very heavenly attitude at the moment.

Friday, May 30, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #139: Favorite Story

Today's Video: "Story of God"

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Discuss/Describe your most favorite story and how it relates to your life today.

I am a big fan of The Pilgrim's Progress by John Bunyan. There's a lot of long passages of theological discourse in there which can be hard to get through, but underneath is a great story of the Christian life, told via allegory. I've also read an adaptation of it by Steven James 
called Quest for Celestia which reimagines it as a fantasy novel. It combines both parts of Bunyan's work (with Kadin standing in for Christian and Leira for Christiana), condenses parts, and renames places and people, but overall tells the same story. It's a book I like to read sometimes cause I guess it helps remind me what the Christian life is really like. "The bitter must come before the sweet," as the messenger tells Christiana. The bit of Christian's burden falling away when he sees the cross is poignant too. 

I also relate to Leira in Quest for Celestia a little, in that she doesn't feel very worthy or beautiful and has to realize King Kiral (King of Celestia) sees her as special. I know how that feels.

So anyway yeah that's my favorite story.

Thursday, May 29, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #138: From The Heart

Today's Video: "Heart Talk"

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Discuss/Describe one recent comment you made that was taken wrong because you said it wrong. You did not speak from the heart.

I have probably said some things to people at work recently that weren't from the heart. I do try to be sincere but sometimes I don't come across that way. Having Asperger's tends to make you blunt, so I think I come across harsher than I mean to most of the time. There are also times I fake being happy when I have to help customers when I'm really miserable, and I hate that.

So I could do better at that sort of thing.

Wednesday, May 28, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #137: Bad Voice

Today's Video: "Costa Rican Cuisine"

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Discuss/Describe a voice that speaks to you that could be destructive.

My own inner critic. It tears me down and makes me feel miserable. It's awful! :(

Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #136: Roach Ew!

Today's Video: "Roaches"

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Discuss/Describe one type of roach in your life and the dirt or drama that you need to clean out of your life.

My own pride, which makes me think I have to be right, that makes me defensive. That has probably caused a lot of unnecessary drama in my life. I need to deal with that big time.

Monday, May 26, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #135: Obedience

Today's Video: "Just Try"

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Discuss/Describe one act of obedience that you need to just try, whether you think you can do it or not.  Include that in your prayer below.

I need to just let go and trust God to control my life instead of insisting I control it myself. It's a tough task, and I have no clue how to do it perfectly, but I know I need to do it.

Dear Lord, I know that the just shall walk by faith, so I need to step out in faith and just try to allow you to control my life instead of trying to control it all myself. I trust that You will support me and give me the strength to get me through any difficulties I have. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.

Sunday, May 25, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #134: Will of God

Today's Video: "Pray for Me - Will"

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Discuss/Describe a choice you are making that is not the will of God. Use that choice in the prayer below.

I am choosing not to stand up and take risks but to play things safe. It's stagnating my life, and I know it. And I hate it. But I'm too afraid of change to do something about it.

Dear Lord, help me realize the gift of free will. Give me strength to rely on YOUR will regarding taking risks in my life. In Luke 22:42 it says " saying, “Father, if it is Your will, take this cup away from Me; nevertheless not My will, but Yours, be done.” Dear Lord, I pray that in all my choices I wait for YOU, and not my will. In Jesus name, Amen.

Saturday, May 24, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #133: Verses for Life

Today's Video: "Sticky Note"

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Discuss/Describe one life situation that you need to apply God’s promises to. Begin memorizing one verse that gives you hope in that situation.

Not gossiping comes to mind. Either that or taking risks. One of those two. Oh and worrying. Any of those would work.

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #132 (Catchup) - Out of Your Way

Today's Video: "Shower Water Tank"

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Discuss/Describe one time you went out of your way to do something that you knew was wrong. What was the result?

Well I know I've jaywalked before when I knew I shouldn't. And usually I get away with it, but one time it resulted in me getting hit by a car.

Sorry that's the only thing I can think of.

Thursday, May 22, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #131: Boiling to Purify

Today's Video: "Hot Water"

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Discuss/Describe one time when a painful situation made you a better person. Thank God for the lessons that He taught you through it.

Well I guess what I went through with Kyle. I hated God for making me go through that, but I guess in the end it taught me how easily I could lose my heart to a guy just cause he was nice to me. It made me more cautious. But I think it might've made me too cautious. As in afraid to get close to any guys. Not so good. 😞

Wednesday, May 21, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #130: In a Cage

Today's Video: "Caged"

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Discuss/Describe one hurt or negative perception of yourself that has you trapped in a cage.

My fear of failure. If I fail at something, I take it personally. I think something must be wrong with me. Instead of thinking constructively how I can do better, or considering that maybe there were other circumstances, I just take it all on myself. But then all the effort I go to not to fail ends up stressing me out. Also, it keeps me from taking risks because I can't predict the outcome of such situations and fear that I might fail. 

Fear of failure paralyzes me, which is basically like a cage.

Tuesday, May 20, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #129: Bad Company

Today's Video: "Bad Fruit"

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Discuss/Describe one person in your life that is causing you to put God second in your life. Someone who is a bad influence in your life?

Oh gosh...I'm not really sure to be honest. I don't have a lot of friends, and the ones I do have I choose with care. 

There probably are some though. I'd have to think about that.

Monday, May 19, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #128: Run Over

Today's Video: "Dead Dog"

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Discuss/Describe one situation of a friend or family member who could be on their way to getting run over by life.

My friend Miyuki comes to mind. She is frustrated by her job at our workplace. I think she might actually complain more than me. She also is the main caretaker of her diabetic boyfriend (with whom she shares an apartment) and has to deal with her "in-laws" (as she calls her boyfriend's parents), who apparently like to make her life miserable. Well, mostly the mom, who's real overprotective of her son. His dad just sort of goes along with the mom. I told her her boyfriend needs to stand up to his mother about this, but apparently her boyfriend's not really the type to do that. The fact that he can't seem to hold a job doesn't help much.

Meanwhile, Miyuki is trying desperately to finish school (she wants to do medical research), but has found it hard to get our work to work around her school schedule. It took me longer than usual to finish school too, but that's cause I only went to school twice a week (more than that at first, but for most of the time it was that way) and never took more than 4 classes at a time, cause that's the most I could handle (the exception to this is when I was getting my web design certificate on top of my B.A.). So I can kinda sympathize. But the reason I only went to school twice a week is cause I finagled my classes to be so, to make it easy on my work to work around it (cause I knew my current work would at least give me 2 days off a week). 

I try to be a supportive friend, but often I don't know what to say to help her. I mean, I have my own stresses too. My friend and coworker Geraldina nicknamed me Reneesme (after the Twilight character); if only I had her power to show people my thoughts. But I don't. 😔

Sunday, May 18, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #127: Give Me Wisdom

Today's Video: "Pray for Me - Wisdom"

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Discuss/Describe one area of your life you have not been using the information given to you correctly. Use that area in the prayer below.

I know all this information about the Bible, from Christian school and church, but I'm not using it to reach people for God or anything. And I should. 

I've taken spiritual gifts tests where my top gift is knowledge, and yet often I'm not using that gift. Frankly I'm not quite sure how to use that gift. Spiritual gifts are supposed to be used for the church, but it isn't clear exactly where in the church having that gift would be useful.

I need to use my knowledge of God - my head knowledge - more wisely and practically. If only I knew how.

Dear Lord, please help me better understand the knowledge I have in the area of the knowledge I have of the Bible. In Proverbs 2:6 it says " For the Lord gives wisdom; From His mouth come knowledge and understanding;” Dear Lord, help me in all my decisions. Let me be wise and lean on to YOU for all understanding. In Jesus name, Amen.

Saturday, May 17, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #126: Friends With Rights

Today's Video: "Amigo Con Derechos"

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Discuss/Describe one way God can move from being a friend with rights, to being your Lord, Master, and God.

If I were to trust him more and give up control of my life and let him lead, that would definitely help me to go from being in an amigo con derechos relationship with him to something more committed. I'm just afraid to do so.

Friday, May 16, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #125: Stopping Cold Turkey

Today's Video: "Cold Turkey"

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Discuss/Describe one type of behavior that you need to stop doing right now. Today. Before you stop reading this sentence...

Complaining. I complain a lot. I'm never content with anything. Never satisfied. It's probably partially my lack of patience, partially my perfectionism. Complaining is something I just naturally fall back on as a habit (just like picking my nails). And I'm not sure how to stop. I know it'll make my life better if I do stop; I'll be happier I think. But I don't know how to stop...

Thursday, May 15, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #124: Step of Faith

Today's Video: "Faith Step"

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Discuss/Describe one challenge God has placed in your life that makes you nervous

God has given me the talent to write, but I'm nervous about all it takes to become a published author - the promotion, the sending things out to publishers, etc. I kinda avoided all that till after high school. Now that I've started even thinking about it, I feel nervous. I feel nervous even sharing my stories with others - writing has always kinda been a private thing for me. And I'm not very thick-skinned when it comes to criticism; I'm actually very defensive. And mostly I'm nervous about messing things up, so I keep trying to read stuff about it, but there's so much to read, it's overwhelming. And I feel like my writing itself is suffering because I'm so worried what others will think of it. I'm having to actually work at my craft instead of it coming effortlessly. (Although sometimes that does still happen). I compare it to Lyra and the alethiometer in Philip Pullman's His Dark Materials trilogy. At first, in her time of innocence, she could read it effortlessly, by grace basically. But then when she grew up, when she gave in to her love for Will and her daemon became fixed (one's daemon becoming fixed is a metaphor of entering puberty in this series), she couldn't read the alethiometer anymore, not as she used to be able to do. Instead, she was going to have actually study how to do so, using books, if she wanted to keep the ability. 

Having to work at something I'm good at is hard for me to accept. I'm the kind of person who likes when it comes effortlessly and gives in to the magic of that. Sometimes the words do just flow, and I just give into it, let the muse take over and just write. Allow the beautiful alchemy of pen and imagination mix together and produce something amazing. In those moments, I feel as if I am the characters, as if for a moment they are real and their world is real, and I can see what they see, feel what they feel, hear what they hear, etc. 

But is it magic or God? I can't tell. I mean, we all have a sense of something more ("He has also set eternity in the human heart," Ecclesiastes 3:11, NIV). And imagination is a powerful thing, something that God clearly has given all the variety and beauty of nature. And if we are made in his image, then we must have that attribute too. (In fact, I just looked it up - the word "imagination" originally comes from the Latin word imago, meaning "image," coming into English by way of another Latin word, the verb imaginari ["to picture to oneself"], then via Latin again [imaginato] and Old French to become imagination in Middle English [Chaucer's English]). It is through imagination that we create things. Animals create nests and stuff by instinct; humans, however, have rational thought and imagination. 

I am reminded of Tolkien's Ainulindalë ("Music of the Ainur") here (which is found in The Silmarillion). Eru Ilúvatar (the chief of the Ainur) instructs the other Ainur to lend their talents to create a Great Music. They do so, and this Great Music serves as the template for the creation and history of Arda (the world in which Middle-Earth and its environs exist within the greater universe of Eä). This is how it is described:

"And it came to pass that Ilúvatar called together all the Ainur and declared to them a mighty theme, unfolding to them things greater and more wonderful than he had yet revealed; and the glory of its beginning and the splendour of its end amazed the Ainur; so that they bowed before Ilúvatar and were silent.

"Then Ilúvatar said to them: 'Of the theme that I have declared to you, I will now that ye make in harmony together a Great Music. And since I have kindled you with the Flame Imperishable, ye shall show forth your powers in adorning this theme, each with his own thoughts and devices, if he will. But I will sit and hearken, and be glad that through you great beauty has been wakened into song.'"

Tolkien goes on from there, of course. But is that not a beautiful description? "Great beauty has been wakened into song." Wow.

God, please make me less nervous about writing, and about sharing my writing with others. Help me to use my talent for your glory, as I have always known I should, and through me waken into song the great beauty that is imagination and story. Amen.


Wednesday, May 14, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #123: I Love You

Today's Video: "Say 'I Love You'"

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Discuss/Describe the one person you need to say, “I love you” to. Make a plan to do it and then go do it.

I'm not sure who I need to say this to. I guess my parents, but my parents aren't interested in empty words, especially my mom. I need to show it through actions. So not sure what to do there...

Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #122: Heart Pumpin'

Today's Video: "Warm Up"

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Discuss/Describe how you think and act when you heart is pumping to serve God, when your mind is focused on God verse when it is not.

I'm not really sure how I think and act when my heart is pumping to serve God. It's been a while since I've been that committed. When it's not, I tend to give in more to worry and stress and negativity. That's about all I can think of to say.

Monday, May 12, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #121: Bible Reading

Today's Video: "Private Devotion"

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Discuss/Describe how often you have been reading your bible. Are you putting in that daily effort?

I read my Bible every day. I have been doing that for many years. (Except last year, when I slacked off on it majorly). I have done this in several different ways. I've done the chapter-a-day method, the multiple-chapter-a-day method, and pre-made reading plans (which is what I've been doing this year - currently I'm doing one where you read through the Bible chronologically). I've read the Bible cover to cover multiple times in multiple "versions" (the ESV is my version of choice right now). In addition, I usually read from some devotional. I've worked through several of these too. At first I did this one they gave us when I graduated high school. Since then, I've done several others, from Charles Spurgeon's Morning and Evening to Sarah Arthur's Walking with Frodo to several in the YouVersion app to now Miles-a-Minute. (Working for a Christian bookstore for almost 2 years largely helped me find them). Other than that, I pray (usually not long enough) and for a while I would sing a hymn too, using the Methodist hymnal I took from my grandparents' house when we cleaned it out (that only lasted a little while cause I only know a handful of the songs, mostly the Christmas carols). 

I don't really study it a huge amount though. I don't really know how, other than the "word study" method where you look up words in concordances that we did at the InterVarsity retreat. I did read Tim LaHaye's How to Study The Bible for Yourself but didn't quite agree with it. The only ways I can think of that I'd enjoy are the word studies or studying it as a story (in other words analyzing it via all that literary theory I learned in school) or the history/archaeology (which is what attracted me to the Archaeological Study Bible, which came out shortly after I started working at Loaves and Fishes but which was really expensive). 

I also have read into old practices like lectio divina, where you don't just read the Scriptures but pray and contemplate them. I tried it but I think found it wasn't for me.

Sometimes though I feel like I'm not sure how to apply what the Bible says, and so I become less motivated to read it. Which sounds stupid but it's true. I've found in my reading recently that in Deuteronomy they actually bring up the idea repeatedly that what God wants is simple: for you to love him with all your heart and soul and to keep his commandments. This idea is echoed in Micah ("He has shown thee, O man, what is good and what The Lord requires of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God") and in the New Testament, where Jesus says the greatest commandment is to "Love The Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind" and that "the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'" Later, in John, he says, "So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples" (John 13:34-35, NLT). So it's probably just me making it complicated. I'm kinda legalistic, and in general all about following the rules (I think it's an Asperger's thing). 

You have to really be open to reading the Bible, or it's not going to do anything for you. It's going to be just like reading any other book to you. That's what I've determined.

Sunday, May 11, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #120: Feeling Worthy

Today's Video: "Pray for Me - Worthy"

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Discuss/Describe one area of your life you don’t feel deserving. Use that request in the prayer below.

I don't feel deserving in the area of being liked and appreciated. I try to be friendly to people, to be helpful and kind and stuff. But sometimes, even when I do work hard and make an effort, it doesn't get appreciated. Or nothing comes of it, like when I work hard to make a website or a video or something that then languishes in obscurity (or isn't liked, like my "Take a Hint" song dub which has 10 dislikes, or the chapters I workshopped in CWCW). And that's frustrating. 

Dear Lord, please help me feel worthy in this area of being liked and appreciated. In Matthew 6:26 it says "Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?” Lord thank YOU for being by my side and lifting me up in my circumstances and feelings of self doubt. In Jesus name, Amen.

Saturday, May 10, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #119: Wait and See

Today's Video: "Prayer Support"

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Discuss/Describe one incident when you prayed and were patient enough to wait for God to send help. Instead you took [of taking?] matters into your own hands.

I don't know if I'm ever that patient. I prefer to control things myself, cause I am afraid of failing, of not seeming capable. I suppose if I was it would help a lot. Make life a lot less stressful. Cause I do stress a lot, and probably unnecessarily. But I'm not sure how not to be that way...

Friday, May 09, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #118: Gifts

Today's Video: "Owl"

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Discuss/Describe the talents and gifts that you think God has given you. Now go and take the spiritual gifts test at http://www.sdrock.com/giftstest and find out.

I definitely have a talent for writing. Even when I'm tired and shouldn't be able to concentrate one wink, I can still write well. In fact, sometimes it's when I'm tired that my imagination is most active. 

I am good at explaining things to people for the most part. 

I am helpful. When I see someone needs help, I am usually prompted to want to help them. (I say "usually" because it doesn't happen all the time. I'm not the sort of person who would stop to help a homeless person under a bridge probably. I didn't even like helping at the homeless shelter my mom used to work at). 

I have a talent for memorization. I can memorize a song after hearing it only 2 or 3 times.

I have dramatic talent, having been in some plays and skits. 

I have a knack for languages; they come easy to me. 

That's all I can think of. (It's easier to think about what I'm not good at than what I am good at. That's how ingrained negativity is in my life...it's sad).

I'll take the test later.


Thursday, May 08, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #117: Visibility

Today's Video: "Leader, Jesus Follower"

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Discuss/Describe how can be a more visible follower of Jesus.

Well I could act more openly like a Christian. I mostly hide it, to the point that people are surprised I am one when they find out. I could witness more, do more for him in the community. Currently I'm not serving at church cause I'm not sure where I fit. So there's that too. It's odd that service is one of my top three spiritual gifts, yet I'm not out there serving. I do like to help people too. Like if I see a checker needs someone to bag for them or service deli has a customer who needs help, I'll help them. 

I think it has to do with being afraid what others will think of me. That and not being very good socially cause of my autism. Neither of those things help. :(

What will people think
If they hear that I'm a Jesus freak
What will people do 
If they find that it's true
I don't really care
If they label me a Jesus freak
There ain't no disguisin' the truth.
--"Jesus Freak," DC Talk

Wednesday, May 07, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #116: One Size Fits All God

Today's Video: "Louis Vuitton"

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Discuss/Describe a situation where you put your faith and trust in something else besides God.

I may have put my trust in myself many a time. Trusting my own talent rather than God. I feel like I just did that with Camp NaNoWriMo, and that failed miserably. Ironically, I was writing a Christian novel. 

There are probably other ones but that comes to mind.

Tuesday, May 06, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #115: Brought to Attention

Today's Video: "Facial"

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Discuss/Describe one fault that has been brought to your attention that you have been in denial about accepting. Then confess it to God and ask Him to cleanse it from your life.

Well one that has been brought indirectly to my attention is that I don't do something to change my situation. All I do is complain, even if it is within my power to change my circumstances. I think this is because I am afraid of change and risk, so I find a place where I'm comfortable and stay there, hunker down there. But then I become dissatisfied if those circumstances don't meet my expectations. But instead of changing them, or even giving them up if I need to, I stay with them, even if I'm miserable.

God, please help me to change this about myself, and to be more proactive about changing my life for the better. In Jesus' name, Amen.

Monday, May 05, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #114: Voices

Today's Video: "Costa Rican Cuisine"

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Discuss/Describe a voice that speaks to you that could be destructive. 

The voices that try to discourage me, tell me I'm not pretty, that I'm a failure, that I'm worthless or good for nothing or that I'll never find a man or a job I love. Those little nagging voices that came from who knows where and stem from the negativity that plagues my life. I wish I could get rid of them, but I don't know how...

Sunday, May 04, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #113: Lack of Faith

Today's Video: "Pray for Me - Faith"

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Discuss/Describe one request from God that you don't have the faith to ask for. Use that request in the prayer below.

To let him control my life. To be willing to let go and let him be God and guide me and direct me. I'm too afraid to give up that control. Too afraid of the risks. Even though I know it could make my life better.

Dear Lord, please help me with my unbelief to ask for you to take control of not just a part of my life, but my whole life. I want to trust to YOU more than I do. In Mark 9:24 it says "Immediately the boy’s father exclaimed, “I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!” So I surrender my unbelief and lack of faith to You. In Jesus name, Amen.

Saturday, May 03, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #112: Run Over

Today's Video: "Do Not Enter -- Run Over By a Truck"

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Discuss/Describe one truck that keeps running you over and the commandment that you are breaking, that is causing it to happen.

Having been hit by a car before, I can relate to this on a literal level. 

I guess for me the commandment is either "Do not covet" or "Honor your father and mother." Coveting is basically envy, wanting something someone else has. And I definitely have issues with that. I'm always comparing myself to other people. I'm never content, it seems. I'm not even sure how to be content. It's frustrating.

"Honor your father and mother" is, as Paul writes, the first commandment with a promise attached -- "that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land" (ESV). It's preceded in Ephesians by a verse telling children to obey their parents "in the Lord, for this is right" (ESV). The implication here seems to be that if you obey your parents, things will go well for you, and you will live long. Of course, this isn't always the case - things don't always go well even for good children, and even the good die young. But I know things are less stressful when I do what my parents say. Like I'm not crazy about their thing (not a rule exactly) about not liking me being out after dark. For a while this wasn't an issue; the bus home only ran till 5:30 PM, so I was always home before dark if I was taking the bus home anyway. Now that the bus runs later during the week, it's become an issue. I get it, they want me to be safe, but it's like, I'm an adult for goodness sake. Hopefully I can get a car soon and not have to worry about that so much. 

I guess the truck is probably unnecessary stress and worry. Cause that does keep happening. And I wish it would stop. Or lessen at least. *sigh*

Friday, May 02, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #111: Accountability

Today's Video: "Cigarettes"

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Discuss/Describe the type of person you would be able to trust to hold you accountable to a specific behavior, such as not smoking, or start reading your bible everyday.

I need someone to hold me accountable for not complaining. But sadly I can't think of someone who could. But if there was someone, I would hope they'd be someone who would be willing to be honest with me even if it hurt. I just hope I would be willing to take it without being defensive. Cause I do tend to get defensive when that happens.

Also I need someone to keep me accountable for other behaviors - gossiping/talking bad about others, how I spend my money, etc. I have many flaws.

Thursday, May 01, 2014

Miles-a-Minute Challenge #110: Missing the Mark

Today's Video: "Bow and Arrow"

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Discuss/Describe one way in which you consistently miss the mark in your relationship with God. One behavior or attitude that does not meet his expectation in your life.

Not being bold about my faith. I tend to hide that I am a Christian instead of practicing the Great Commission or trying to speak God's Word into people's lives. That's something I need to work on. I'm not a gifted evangelist though, so I'm not sure how God expects me to do that. But I need to!